Saturday, December 10, 2011

life is moving.

which i'm happy for.
moving up and out,
progressing the way i want to.

growing.
learning.
loving.
hurting.

i think i'm more of an adult now than i've ever been.
it's scary.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

breathe, just breathe.


inhale.
exhale.
inhale.
exhale.

this shit isn't working, why won't you

hold me.
comfort me.
be there for me.


grow old with me.
love me?
you're too far.



hold on, just hold on.
i know it's hard, and i understand.


i'm here for you.
to hold you.
to sit with you.
love you.
laugh.
just breathe.


you'll
make
it.


inhale.
exhale.
inhale.
exhale.


breathe all you want, little bird.
i've got a hold of you.


take you down.
far from reach.
no one is there for you.



you can't make it.
you won't make it.
i'll make sure of it.


inhale.
exhale.
inhale.
exhale.


why did you push me over the edge?


i thought you
loved me.
held me.
needed me.



don't you care?

Sunday, September 4, 2011

it's a brand new day.

So, I'm at Coffee Break and it's gotten cold.
being here reminds me of jessie and area 51 [something i'd rather not remember].
i have work tomorrow, and i'm getting paid time-and-a-half.
love it.
just letting everyone know that i'm still alive after this weekend.
...because if you saw me this weekend, you'd be wondering.

love!

Thursday, September 1, 2011

qurl gone cray craaaayy

i went cray cray and am still awake doing homework.
...oh and got a tattoo. a second tattoo. yeauhhhh.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Well lookie here.. a little diddy for your weekend.

I found this while googling Les Miserables. I'm getting a tattoo designed with this quote, and I thought this was a wonderful little sussy for your weekend. It's so true, and speaks volumes! Happy Weekend, everyone. :]

"To Love Another Person Is To See The Face Of God.

I found this while googling Les Miserables. I'm getting a tattoo designed with this quote, and I thought this was a wonderful little sussy for your weekend. It's so true, and speaks volumes! Happy Weekend, everyone. :]


In the play Les Miserables, near the end Jean Valjean says "to love another person is to see the face of God." WOW!! Every time I heard that, I would stop the CD and think, what a wonderful saying. I think loving a person is not an easy thing to do. Now I don't mean as a lover or a spouse. I mean as a friend, as person you will drop what you are doing to be there for them.

When you meet a new person, you stop to ask yourself all kinds of questions about why, how and why not? You have to judge how that person will add joy to your life. You have to figure out if that person will add value to your life. But when you come right down to it, you get a feeling down deep in your soul, that is a person you can love. And one that will love you in return.

The beauty that comes with making friends, is that it brings trust, love and loyalty. You pick a friend that listens, stops and listens. You pick a friend that lets you talk and waits until you are done, before they offer advice. You pick a friend that makes you laugh and lets you cry. You are the kind of friend that offers to lend a hand and a heart. You don't judge your friend on what they do or how much money they have. You want them to be your friend, because they know the end of your sentence before you finished it. Your friend will call you, when your are thinking about them. They know when you need them before your ask them.

You don't have to send birthday cards to tell them how much you treasure them. On Christmas you don't have to buy them a present, because it is your friendship they value. This friend will wait by the phone for you to call with news that you are OK. You will take your friend to the doctor, when they are afraid to go alone. You share a double hot fudge sundae the day before the diet starts. When they go on the patch to quite smoking, you buy gourmet lolly pops, to take the place of cigarettes. You know their favorite color and they know your children's names.
You have told them things that you never had the nerve to say out loud, and they never told a soul. If you tell your friend that you want to see the ocean for your birthday, she reserves a beach front hotel for you and her. When she gets a divorce, you help with the paper work, and never say a bad word about her choice of men. She sits with a sick family member, so you can get some sleep. Your friend can be a man or a women. A spiritual bond is formed. Something that will last for all time.

You have misunderstandings, words and right out yelling matches. But you heart is lonely without your friend. In each life we are lucky if we are blessed with one or two best friends. I have 3, one is in Arizona, one in North Carolina and one here in Florida. There are from different times in my life. The one is Arizona is Linda, we both were young wives, in 1965 in New Jersey. We had our first sons together. She moved on to Arizona and we lost touch for over 20 years, she is back in my life and we speak almost daily by e-mail. The one from North Carolina is Fran, she and I became friends in New Jersey as well. We have been friends for over 23 years. We only see each once a year. She is as near as a phone call in the middle of the night. We have been there for each other during some really frighten times. Sometimes it was me that leaned on her, and sometimes she was leaning on me. My Florida friend is Barbara, we have known each other 2 years this month. She gives me more than I deserve, and I love her more than is possible. She showed me the way back to me, and I showed her she is someone that should be proud of all she has accomplished.
I was an only child, and never learned to share. I never really had much to share to start off with. The friends I met along the way brought out the best of me, and gave me the best of them. They didn't care that I was heavy, changed my hair color weekly or couldn't drive. I didn't mind that they were wise, funny and generous. We would and still do, sit together and laugh one minute and cry the next 5 minutes. They have problems that they could only share with me, their inner feelings was laid on my heart and we prayed together. I asked for advice from them and they were honest and fair. Each one of them gave me something so precious, their time, their attention and their whole heart. In them I see Goodness. In me they see hopefulness.

While doing my column, I have met friends, that filled my heart with joy. I have seen unselfish acts by on-line friends. We have called hospital rooms in different states checking on their family. We started prayer groups. We tracked down missing buddies, if they were not on line in a week or so. We celebrated births, and weddings. We mourned for deaths and losses. We have talked on the phone, in Instants mail, in chat rooms and in person. We let dinner grow cold to give friendly ear. We have kept secrets. We rejoice in happiness and feel deep despair in sadness. We have had parties on AOL. A bridal shower, and Christmas in July were on line between friends that will still be friends in the next century. We tried to save TV shows, children's lives, and each others sanity. We bring jokes, poems and true stories to each other. We encourage and share faith. We send notes and gifts to each other because we are part of one wonderful world. What we see in each other is Kindness, Goodness, Forgiveness and Faithfulness.

"To Love Another Person Is To See The Face Of God."

Thursday, July 14, 2011

it's been a while...

so. it's been a while. i will make you two lists, you lucky reader.

1. i moved to Sal Tlay Ka Siti. [say it out loud.]

2. i love it here.

3. i work at the gateway basics, and it suxxxx.

4. i cut my hair and colored it.

5. i'm hoping to work at forever 21 instead of downeast soon. pretty pretty please karma gods love me this once.

second list.

i believe that everyone should love who they want to love without discrimination. period.

i believe that there is beauty everywhere, that's why you need to walk and enjoy the magnificence around you.

i believe that you can find joy at all times. be optimistic.

i believe that people come in and out of your life for a reason, whether that ended badly or you're still close. they were/are there to make you life better/realize that you're a better person that whomever you were before you met them. [run-on sentence? probably.]

i believe in true love. i've yet to find true, everlasting love with a special someone, but they're out there.

i believe friends are your family. bottom line.

i believe that god loves everyone, and will share his love, no matter what.

<3

Friday, June 3, 2011

we chalked and got caught! ...kind of.

so. eliza and i closed together.

we had this brilliant idea of chalking peter's driveway.
so. after work, we went to my house, got the chalk, almost kind of got lost looking for peter's house, and chalked.

but.

the best part was that he came home. yup, he came home and walked right passed us and didn't even look.

wtf?

SO funny. so, of course, i called him after we finished our artwork and told him it was us. then we proceeded to talk outside for an hour.

i love that boy.
i love eliza.
i love my de family.

ps. who shops with their dog on a leash in a store? idk.

love, f.